What Would You Give for Your Soul

Yesterday, our lab received a cell culture workstation that was 585lbs per June Sun and it need to go from the hall way into a small room in the lab. Everyone was saying they needed to get a few guys in here to move it and I looked at it and figured all we needed was a strong cart. So, got everyone together and loaded the bulky thing onto the cart and wheeled it in to the lab. With a little ingenuity and leverage we got it into the lab, with out any extra help. You just have to look at a tough job and roll up your sleeves and just get her done. We had a little fun afterwards running down the hall with people on the cart, you have to have fun while you work. The feeling of being appreciated by your fellow colleges and being able to help, was wonderful. It has been difficult to go away from the actual lab and working with computers. People do not see me working and I feel like I have not been getting the respect for the massive amount of work I have been doing. The lift it gave my soul was wonderful, but not what I have been missing and yearning for and I still had another tough challenge that day of meeting with my professor on my INDS course.

I had just finished working with Bill Brody on my Independent Study Course and he wanted more revisions, what else would you expect from an excellent artist. Being exhausted and sick from a chest cold, I went back to my office for a breather and walked in on a classical piece from a composer called Palestrina "Assumpta est Maria in Caelum" Mass (Inner Peace). I didn't even turn on the lights and put my feet up on the desk and leaned back, closed my eyes, and let my soul be taken away. The feeling of contentment and inner peace was permeating my soul and I drifted on the wave of music for a long time. Contentment and inner peace has been a distant fellow for a long time now with all of the changes I have been through. I feel like I have finally have that inner peace of what I have become and how I have arrived to this point. The journey has been difficult and full of trajedy and pain, but I knew with help from friends, family, and all around strength of soul; I could survive and finally flourish into a new women.

With this rejuvenation and feeling of contentment finally, I had to get to the gym.
Even though I am sick as a dog, I had set up an appointment to be certified to climb on the rock wall, so I dragged my tired petunia to the gym. I'm sitting there as usual, with my blinders on when you are changing in the locker room, and I realized I had forgoten to bring my other sneakers, so I had to climb the rock wall with my basketball sneakers. Of course to make matters more funny and ironic an old roommate Tim Ciosek, who is an accomplished rock climber was there, and I had to say what do you think of my basketball shoes, he said "at least you will stick to the wall". The whole class laughed and I didn't feel bad, since I am finally content and just take what life gives me with a new spirit. Make the best out of a bad situation and now there is a light at the end of the tunnel if you keep working at it and don't give up.

Life's ironies just keep rolling when I went home I was restless even though sick and ate some red salmon and felt refreshed. The restlessness didn't go away and I went to the Marlin and then listened to an excellent melancoly song called "What would you give for your soul". The look and emotion on the blue grass players You could feel and from your own soul know what you would give up your soul for "Love". That beautiful and sweet tender love with another human being is worth your soul.
Not the freedom of chasing rainbows to their end and never being able to touch them, or the artistry of life, but the loving touch of another human being is worth your soul.